Creating order in chaos - A guide to keeping present in times of high stress

self-iso-fashun

These are really weird times. Like, really weird. 

As I write this, I’ve now been working from home for almost four weeks. Most of the working population in Australia (that can) has also moved to remote working, many others have lost their jobs, gyms, cafes, bars and restaurants are shut, schools are shutting and all non essential gatherings over two people have been banned, the borders are closing – the list of things affected by COVID-19 get's longer by the day.

I’m still trying to wrap my head around what is going on. It’s quite overwhelming and humbling to think that every one of us is facing the same struggles right now.

While I am certainly feeling the effects of not only the virus, but the subsequent economic downturn on both my professional and personal life, I know I have a lot to be grateful for. I have my health, a roof, food in my fridge, toilet paper in my bathroom(!) and some gym gear in my garage. 

With no concrete timings for when anything will return back to some sort of normality, and new announcements from the government coming in thick and fast almost by the day, any long term, mid term, hell, even most short term plans have been well and truly thrown out of the window. All that we’re left with right now is what we’re working with in the present moment.

It’s the cliche old sayings that I heard (and said) so many times when first grieving the loss of my Dad – just take it day by day – sounded a hell of a lot easier than it actually was.  That was until… it was the only option left.

Now, there is no room for us to be forward looking or future planning, we really only have the 24hours in front of us. So, what can we do to focus on the immediate future in front of us? What can we do to be present? And why is this important?

In times of high stress or uncertainty, such as now, it's important to focus on the things within our power to control, such as our actions and our reactions. 

I’ve included some practical tips below that I’ve been using to help me stay centered and as calm as possible while I let the world events unfold around me. I still get overwhelmed (almost daily) by what’s happening, but leveraging these tools has helped enormously to keep me focused on what is directly within my control.

A guide to keeping present in times of high stress

1. Set a solid daily structure

This is probably my number one recommendation for life in general really: set your day up for success with a good daily routine. I’m a big believer in daily routines to enable you to own the day. Without it, I find my day owns me instead and runs away with me.

Now 95% or our lives operate within the same four walls (who else thrives on the weekly supermarket trip right now?), I’ve found that the days go by astonishingly easily, which I don't actually think is a good thing. 

I’ve found implementing routine in my daily life, despite the fact it’s completely turned on its head, a helpful way for me to partition my days, even if they are spent in the same room and instill the same discipline I had before. For me, the structure keeps me sane, otherwise I find myself just going through the motions and I get frustrated and feel lost. So now I’m still getting up early, making my bed, journalling, mediating, going for a walk and having my coffee first thing on a morning to set myself up for a solid day ahead. Just because I’m not leaving home doesn't mean I’m going to start my day by rolling out of bed at 8.45am to start work at 9am.

The routine you set may not be the same structure you would have had in your normal life before-COVID (BC… I’m claiming that) as it likely will not serve your new way of operating. Find your own unique way that sets you up for success and stick to it.

2. Set specific working from home boundaries

I used to like working from home. I would make jokes about the amount of washing I’d get through in the background, or how productive I was when no one was asking me questions. What I didn’t realise is, once ‘home’ because the venue I conducted ALL my business, that novelty fast wears off.

Working from home can take some getting used to. Usually, there’s a very clear line between our work and home lives, in the sense they are two very different places. Now we are doing both under the one roof.

Set clear boundaries between your work and the rest of your life, otherwise you will find it all bleeds into one and before you know it it feels like you are working constantly. This includes the specific hours that you will be working, whether that’s nine to five or something different, and making sure that you keep over time to a minimum (and be sure to communicate these with both your colleagues and people you live with). 

I also recommend implementing little ‘rituals’ that signify the beginning or end of your work.  For example, I always make a coffee before sitting down to do my work. This small act just makes me metnally ready to commit to the tasks ahead of me. Similarly at the end of the day I rewrite my to do list for the next day before clearing my inbox (as best I can) and shut my laptop to mentally close my work day off (most of the time).

3. Do the little things that make you happy

Whether it’s reading, playing the trumpet for four hours a day like my neighbour does, baking, painting or doing a puzzle. Leveraging the technology tools at our disposal and carving out time to connect with loved ones. Maybe, it’s as simple as the coffee you make in the morning, the 10 minutes on the balcony in the sun or finally tidying out the kitchen cupboards – find what it is that hits you in the Marie Kondo and do it.  

However, while watching back to back episodes of The IT Crowd or unstoppable scrolling through TikTok can be equally as fun and of course serve their purpose if you want to chill out for a while, it’s really important to weave in activities that are both fun and grounding for us, rather than just zoning out of things completely. Trying to find activities that focus your attention on the task at hand as these can help keep you in the present moment. 

4. Journal and practice gratitude

Many of us are in very privileged positions that despite the chaos going on around us, we still have a lot to be thankful for. I first started journaling each morning a year or so ago and found it so helpful in keeping centered and present each morning, as well as helping me focus on positive things when I was perhaps feeling down or struggling mentally. It was instrumental for me keeping an even keel while at home with Dad when, honestly, everything felt like it was falling apart.

Practicing gratitude, doesn't mean you have to ignore the tough stuff going on or pretend it's not happening. Sometimes it’s really important to acknowledge our negative emotions, sit with them and witness them. But, the all-consuming nature of negative thoughts often mean they can very easily become the only thing we focus on. Making a small list each morning of the things I am grateful for helps me start my day off with a more positive mindset.

5. Meditate

I’m new to mediating but I have found it enormously beneficial for helping me organise my thoughts and ensure I take a moment to sit, be present, surrender to whatever the hell is going on.

Even though many of us are working from home, it feels busier than it did before. There’s a certain unspoken pressure to always be ‘on’ thanks in part to the wonderful technology I just lauded for keeping us all so connected. Our brains are working so much harder to process the information coming at us from all screens that I’m not sure about you, but I feel out of breath by the end of day.

Forcing yourself to sit and be still in body and in mind, whether that’s for 15 minutes or 30 minutes, is incredibly powerful. However, I appreciate that sitting still for a period of time might not be beneficial for everyone. Some people find this stillness frustrating rather than calming and grounding.

If you haven’t meditated before and don’t know where to start I highly recommend the 1 Giant Mind app (I’m biased as the founder, Jonni Pollard, was my meditation teacher). I really like the Vedic Meditation technique and think it's a really good way for beginners to learn. “Switching off the mind” is a difficult concept to grasp if you’re unsure how, but the Vedic method is a really effortless practice.

The Headspace app is also good meditation aid and I like how it provides themes for each meditation.

If you’re struggling right now (I wouldn’t blame you or be surprised if you were) please remember you’re not alone. Reach out to friends and loved ones as regularly as possible, do the things you can to make your heart happy and remember to focus on the present and the things directly in your control.

Stay safe and STAY HOME.

Robyn xxx